“Up until now, I have been in training.”
I can now see how each piece of the puzzle brought me one step closer to a greater understanding of myself. As I graduated through the moments in my life, I learned how to make the decisions to honor my wellbeing. I can now use those skills to address challenges today as they arise. I hone those skills from my past and use them as magic wands to create rainbows of adventure and intrigue.
10 Year Increments of Growing Up
My life seemed to be made up of 10 year increments of what I call life stages, composed of a multitude of very crucial moments for me. All of those phases were each significant in their own way. But that which I feel was the greatest phase, wherein I became a student of “Me-how University” was from 2005 to 2016. Then 2017 was the most tumultuous because it provided the most information I would need to sum up and connect the dots, and I entered into a new life of self-awareness, understanding and awakening.
Those last 13 years helped me make the shift from a life borrowed from others to a life styled for me by me. As opposed to my years as a child, I’d say those latter years were actually my “growing up” ones. In retrospect I think that all of these life stages of development were important because I learned many things about myself in increments. In fact, that is what has built and shaped me today. Every little conversation, every little perception, every little thought or feeling created my network of beliefs and values. My evolving mindset continually shaped how I moved through my experiences and affected the way I perceived each and every one of them. And it took quite a bit of confronting, examining, releasing and embracing of that whole journey, to eventually lead me to an apex of self discovery. I finally could feel and know that I had graduated through a multitude of incremental defining moments of growth. Until I got to that point, I became determined to finally live life my way. I was able to cast away the Quasimodo burden I carried on my back once and for all. With self-acceptance, self-confidence, self-assurance, self-efficacy, self love, and a expanding self esteem, I finally have a foundation to stand upon and just go and pursue what makes my heart sing. I went from surviving to thriving and of course the journey never ends as potential never does. Just like that empty canvas or plain piece of paper, I have taken my lessons through experiences, learned and grew, and used it to shape, mold, fold and bend my life to my will, whims, and wishes. And that’s what I refer to as Life Origami. Today I’m living my life the way I wish I could have way back in the day.
Thumb Drive To My Life’s Fantastic Adventure
I wish I had discovered the thumb drive to My Life’s Fantastic Adventure during those times of wandering aimlessly when I was younger, immature, and inexperienced. However that would have been impossible. I would have needed all the lessons I have accumulated up until now from my lifetime of experiences, in order for it to have been of any use or value to me back then. True I received opinions and wisdom from some key people in my life but that was based on their mindsets. I needed to learn about ME. They couldn’t be as helpful as that which I could teach myself about me. Ultimately I needed to create my own concept and reality of what I consider to be a satisfying and fulfilling life for me. I needed to discover my own talents and gifts. I would then find a way to take that artistic creativity and write the script of a compelling life. This life would be a passionate expression of my innermost being, and would flow naturally with a rhythm of contentment.
No More Spinning and Lingering
With that realization, I moved beyond motivation and drive and moved forward into action. Once I knew what I wanted I could start building it! And I had the compass leading me to my True North. I was able to create movement. Right away I received numerous benefits, once knowing where to direct my arrow. Knowing myself helped me envision the results I wanted. And from there I could create a congruent daily life with my attention on my intentions. Here’s what happened:
- I started living the way I wanted, enjoying a life of passion and integrity.
- Today I experience what matters to me and disregard that which hinders me. I follow what is to my higher good rather than what doesn’t serve my happiness factor.
- There is no more spinning in circles because I know my direction and goals and I can make better use of my time. There is no more wasteful lingering in the tyranny of the incringements that were holding me back. Those roadblocks of self doubt and non-acceptance consumed my energy and kept me back from giving myself permission to not only dream, but go out and develop it. So indulging in wasted space in my head is not for me. Shrinking does not become me.
- With a whole new perspective and purpose, living in the present influences my day-to-day beliefs, values, morals, principles, ethics, attitude, decisions and behaviours in a positive way.
- I give myself permission to leave dysfunctional relationships that hurt me and hold me back from trying to be happy, based on what I feel that means for me.
- I can be more engaged in the present and engage less time in damaging self dialogue pertaining to past hurts, feelings and memories. Even my physical health is better because of a healthier mindset.
- My life feels more purposeful with more meaning, rather than boomeranging here and there in confusion and unable to make choices.
Skills & Tools I Extracted
The Skills and Tools I extracted from those hard lessons of the past, and the good ones too, only evolved as I moved through the learning curve as a student of my life. I learned that I could not go around, under, or above this learning curve. I couldn’t spend my way through it either. I had to go through it. But with the skills and tools I created, I can now use them to accelerate through any learning moments as they come up.
I can now live my life as if I matter. And I am freed knowing that I am “Enough and More”!
Do Not Define Me
I believe that the things I went through before do not define me today. And they are not relevant and do not necessitate a label of any sort because I am and never was “Broken” or “Wrecked”. I do not blame, shame, guilt-beat myself into co-dependent relationships and attempt to control that which is not my business or baggage to take on. I am continuously learning to respond rather than react to situations, which gives me greater self-empowerment and control of my emotions.
I know my weaknesses and work with them rather than against, and I also know my strengths so I can tap into them when desired.
Being able to live in the now, in the present, enables me to show up in the world today and allows me to build the legacy that I desire.
Offering Other People Inner Harmony
Taking my tools and skills from all those experiences that I learned to use, I can now offer other people, who are experiencing similar conditions, to tap into their inner harmony and help them become students in the University of “You How”, not “Others How”. I wish I had these tools way back in the day and I feel like some of the roadblocks wouldn’t have been so monumental or devastating. And I wish I could have embraced all the good times and not spent so much time smearing them with so much investment into other peoples judgments and projections on me. I would have enjoyed life more fully and been more engaged with the things I wanted more of rather than I wanted less of. Being present in the now would have been a valuable tool in mindfulness. This is a skill I was developing even back then but didn’t lasso and harness until this phase of my life.
Navigating Through The Learning Curve
And now with my own thumb drive of skills and tools that I have used to navigate through the learning curve, I am able to contribute to the practice of Life Origami for others. I am dancing in my dreams awake. And the truth is, if I could figure it all out and can do it, then pretty much anybody else can too because it all took small steps to get here, nothing monumental. We all have this ability, just a bit of support sure goes a long way.
You Are Magnificent
I can think of many people who have contributed to each of my moments of truth, giving me valuable insights and wisdom. We all need support and I really want to be there for others and help them deal with the same emotions we all feel in the clubhouse of humanity. Our experiences and situations may be different, but one thing we all have in common is feelings. And I just want you all to know that you “Are Enough” and more. And your past doesn’t define you. “You are not broken”. You just need to tap into your inner gifts and strengths and learn who you are and how you want to express that in the life of your choosing. You only need to claim your birthright to love, joy, peace, tranquility, safety and healthy wellbeing. And that is what I want to help you discover for yourself. I want to help you tap into your own inner resources, becoming unshakeable and unbound. Your life is your teacher. You are your own Guru. You are Magnificent.